They're Growing Up?

The boys and I were chit-chatting recently and in the midst of our conversation I said I had to pee and I'd be right back.  I stepped into the bathroom and realized there was no toilet paper.  So I turned back around and told the kids I needed to get some.  Logan said, "Why?  You just said you have to pee."  I looked at him and explained that girls use toilet paper when they pee and when they poop.  The kids' eyes got real wide and they burst into laughter.  I heard them laughing all the way down the hallway into my bedroom.  (When I told Ed about this, he said, "I'm glad they know that already because I didn't learn it until - no joke - 1998.")

Tonight, the Logan and Declan had a fun little game of creative name-calling.  They would combine an animal with a body part and sling these fascinating combinations at each other, followed by giggles galore.  "Mr. Elephant Face!" "Mr. Dog Butt!"  "Mrs. Cow Brain!"  Pretty standard 7-8 year old stuff.  Until... "Miss Pussy Lips!"  [insert record scratch]  I'm pretty sure my jaw hit the floor.  I looked at Chris to see him immediately turn a 180 so he wasn't facing the kids, his face scrunched up in hysterics.  It took a minute of choking back laughter before we could clear the air and request that particular one not be repeated.

Not an hour after, at dinner, Logan was deep in thought.  I asked him what was on his mind.  Some hemming-and-hawing later, he said he had been thinking about how to say bad words in Pig Latin.  Oh-so-helpful Chris: "Like it-shay?"  Logan, excitedly: "Yeah!  That's the one!"

So.  I've talked with Chris and Ed, and between nipply conversation from a few days ago, the hilarious discovery of female toilet paper needs, the ahem cat lips, and sigh swearing in Pig Latin, it's been decided that it's time for the boys to get a talk.  Not just any talk.  The talk.

This should be fun.